Dear Mother's Day,
This year I celebrated You from a new perspective and to be quite honest it didn't go "right." I understand that this is, in large part my fault, and I am really working on owning that fact. I was unprepared, and I didn't understand my wants, needs or feelings related to you. See, I believe that there are some thing in life you should make a fuss about, and there are some things in life that I don't think deserve a fuss. I didn't think You deserved a fuss so I told my Bear not to get anything (This usually means that he will spend less then $20. Which he did.). But a few weeks before You got here we had my parents over and we decided that we wanted to watch a movie... as we talked about what movie to watch I said that if we were at their house we could use their "On Demand" to watch Catching Fire as none of us had seen it. This prompted Bear to give me my gift (Catching Fire) early so we could all watch it together. Is was a nice evening and I enjoyed the movie. But then You got here for real.
I should also tell you, dear Mother's Day, that the week You were scheduled to get here my Mother had to have surgery. She is doing OK, healing, but it was a pretty big deal. She got out of the hospital the day before You. So when You get here I went to my mom's place to be with her so she didn't have to be alone while my dad was preaching. This meant I woke up early and got out of the house as quickly as is possible with my three month old so that we could be with Nana. Bear decided that he would bring us breakfast but there was a bit of miscommunication (thank you text messaging) and I didn't exactly get my order. Then our little bear had a huge freak out and I realized that I forget his pacifier at home so Bear drove back home to get the pacifier, which was so nice of him but that meant that we used up all the family time we had before he had to go to work. So off goes Bear after dropping off the pacifier.
As the day went on there were plenty of things that were nice, I got to nap with little bear and had some really nice talks with my parents. I got a book to read with Little Bear that will be really nice and some new burp clothes because even though I now own about 20 I can still never find one when I need one. But in the end I felt disappointed. There was no fanfare, there was nothing special about the day. And honestly after the surgery and a few others things that happened that week I was still really stressed. Now that I am on this side of Your visit I am moving past the disappointment and I have learned a lesson. I want just a little rigmarole. I want a gift (on Mother's Day) not a pricey one but something. I want a nice dinner, preferably one I don't have to cook, is not circular, and has never been frozen.
Next year Mother's day I know what I am going to do and I am going to much better prepared to enjoy You rather than feel let down by You. I've got your number, and I've got a plan.
Sincerely,
Jessica
